Letter to Eli, 26 Months

Dear Eli, This past month has been a tough one for us, although I am not sure how aware of that you have been. Your grandmother has begun slipping beneath the final waves of dementia and has gone into hospice care. As she becomes more and more unresponsive she still takes enjoyment from you. Even when nothing else seems to get through to her, a hug and a kiss from you, or even seeing your picture will bring out a smile.

Grandma and Uncle Kevin watching you play.

While this has of course been quite difficult for me, for you it has meant that Uncle Kevin and Aunt Misa have come from Japan to visit.

“More dizzy!” you said. Again, and again, and again. Poor Uncle Kevin ended up quite motion sick!

We have all been enjoying their presence here with us, and you have taken to your Aunt Misa like a little bear cub to honey. You can’t seem to get enough of her. When they are here you are constantly playing with her, hugging her, climbing on her, demanding one game and then another.

Enjoying the Elmo sushi Aunt Misa made you.

She likewise has taken to you as well. She and Uncle Kevin have watched you on a number of occasions this past month, allowing your father and I more “date night” opportunities than we’ve had since you were born.

I think this practice with being able to separate from us a bit more frequently has been helpful in getting you ready to re-enter the Thursday group therapy program. When we had tried having you participate there a couple of months age, while I went into the parent education meeting it was a disaster. You were beside yourself during the hour we were apart and for days afterwards were extra clingy. You even had night terrors that night. Last Thursday though we gave it a try again for the last half hour of the program. You did fantastic! No tears, and you enjoyed and participated in the activities. You were very excited to tell me all about getting to use the alligator puppet during circle time when I came back for you. I was so proud of you!

Wearing a helmet as you try out your 2 wheeled “Footcycle”.

You have also been doing a lot of things you were previously afraid of or adverse to up until now. You are now enjoying a variety of swings. You are eating almost normally. You are even willing to wear a bicycle helmet now! It seems like almost everyday you surprise me by doing something I wouldn’t have imagined you doing just a month ago.

Your obsessions with guitars and working like Daddy are neither new, nor are they showing any sign of diminishing.

What is new this month is your attachment to playing with your wooden slice and bake cookie set. You never tire of the humor of pretending the cookie just off of the cookie sheet is hot and about to burn you!

Also new is your attachment to your stuffed giraffe. You have periods when ‘Raff has to do everything with you. Books must be held so he gets the best view and you bob his head along to the words of the story. His hoof must be used to push buttons on remote controls or to hold any pencil or crayon. It is most distressing to you if anything happens without ‘Raff’s participation when you are in this mode.

Technology AND live music… it just doesn’t get any better than that!

Your father and I spent a delightful Saturday at the beach with you earlier this past month. I hope we can do a lot more of that throughout the summer months. You serenaded us in the car for 20 minutes on the way home singing an Eli original goodbye song to the beach.

Even in the midst of many stresses our family is experiencing right now you manage to bring so much joy to us everyday. Thank you for delighting, inspiring and loving on us in this way that is so uniquely yours.

I love you so very, very, very much!

Mama

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20 Comments

  1. May 7, 2012 at 6:06 am

    Sorry to hear about grandma. Best wishes with everything. Great pictures – there were so many good ones! We lived in Japan for four years and I remember seeing all the Bento lunches kids brought to school. That Elmo one was great – haven’t seen one like that in years

    • May 8, 2012 at 4:06 pm

      Thank you for your comment. I’m going to be doing a lot of experimenting with Bento style lunches in the coming days.

  2. Sleeping Mom said,

    May 7, 2012 at 9:31 am

    So sorry about your grandma. Sending over lots of hugs and well wishes! Eli truly is a blessing for her šŸ™‚

  3. May 7, 2012 at 10:09 am

    These letters are so precious. You will treasure having them to always refer back to. How fun for Eli, too. So sorry to hear about your grandma. šŸ˜¦

  4. Christine said,

    May 8, 2012 at 7:41 am

    That is so cute!!! Especially with the giraffe. Sorry to hear about grandma, that is so hard…..
    My kids’ grandpa is hospitalized with bacterial meningitis and is not doing well. It is likely that he will be released to a nursing home and won’t be returning to his own home. Eli is not alone in this….

  5. Maysem said,

    May 8, 2012 at 1:14 pm

    As always, I enjoy reading your letters to Eli:)

  6. randalin said,

    May 9, 2012 at 12:55 pm

    I love reading these updates. It sounds like every month Eli is doing more and more amazing šŸ™‚ It’s been a joy to follow you both on here!

  7. tdblue said,

    May 9, 2012 at 7:59 pm

    This brought tears to my eyes. I am sorry about Grandma. My mother is mentally ill, and half the time she forgets she has a grandson, so I know how heart-breaking it can be. But these letters you write to your son are truly a gift. Thanks for sharing. šŸ™‚

    • May 11, 2012 at 3:02 pm

      I’m so sorry to hear of your family’s situation! It is heartbreaking. Sometime you just yearn for the “normal” grandparent experience for your child.Thank you for coming by for a visit an leaving a comment.

  8. Misa said,

    May 10, 2012 at 4:45 pm

    yes, Eli brings your mom smile and even makes her laugh sometimes when she sees his photos. He’s so precious! It’s been a joy and fun to see him learning and speaking new words everyday. And you’re a wonderful mama!

  9. May 13, 2012 at 1:06 pm

    I love this post, thanks for sharing.

  10. May 26, 2012 at 1:29 pm

    wow…you made me cry and smile. I love the internet and hope that when he is older this form of social media will still be accessable. You should print this post out for him just in case it isn’t…who knows with the way the world is now. I’m sure our parents and grandparents thought 35mm slides were going to be around forever…I mean, why wouldn’t they?

  11. katiebarlow said,

    May 28, 2012 at 9:35 pm

    What a neat idea to write a blog post in the form of a letter to your son so he can read it when he is older. I love it! So sorry to hear about grandma. Thoughts and prayers to you and your family.


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